Christmas Present Jokes

Christmas Present Jokes

Funny Present Jokes For The Christmas Holidays

 

Q: What did the farmer get for Christmas?

A: A cow-culator!

Q: Why didn’t you get me anything for Christmas?

A: You told me to surprise you!

Q: What did the elephant wish for Christmas?

A: A trunk full of gifts!

Q: Can I have a puppy for Christmas?

A: Certainly not. You can have turkey like everybody else!

Q: What do wizards use to wrap their presents?
A: 
Spell-o-tape!

Q: What did the dog get for Christmas?
A: 
A mobile bone!

Q: What does a DJ like about Christmas?

A: He can do lots of rapping!

Q: What did the caveman get his wife for Christmas?
A: 
Ughes and Kisses!

Q: Why does my Christmas stocking’s got a hole in it?
A: 
Of course it has. That’s to get the presents in!

Q: Where do you find a Christmas present for a cat?
A: 
In a cat-alogue!

Q: What did one Christmas tree say to the other?

A: I’ve got a present fir you!

Q: What do you get when you cross an archer with a gift wrapper?

A: Ribbon Hood!

Q: Why did Scrooge buy everyone birds for Christmas?

A: He heard that they were going cheep!

Q: What did the bald man say when he got a comb for Christmas?

A: Thanks. I’ll never part with it!

Q: Can I have a broken drum for Christmas?

A: The best thing you could have asked for. You can’t beat it!

Q: What do you give a 900-pound gorilla for Christmas?

A: I don’t know, but you’d better hope he likes it!

Q: How many presents can Santa fit into an empty sack?

A: Only one. After then it is not empty any more!

Q: Dear Santa, could you please send me some Crocodile shoes?
A: Can’t do that one. You haven’t said what size is the crocodile’s feet!

Q: What would you give to the man who has everything?
A: Penicillin?

Q: Do you have any neck ties that will go with my husbands blue eyes?
A: Blue, But your husbands’s eyes are brown!